Only you can see your reality

Nov 8, 2023 | Wellness


The reality you are living doesn’t have to be your reality forever. Well, unless you want it to be that way. 

You see, the now that you are experiencing can be temporary, unless you want it to remain.

You have the power to make your reality what you want it to be. As I’ve always said, you are in the driver’s seat. The question is, are you in control or are you on autopilot?

Autopilot feels like life is happening to you. Whereas, determining where life takes you feels like life is happening for you. It’s the difference between feeling like you are the victim of what has happened versus knowing that all your decisions and actions have actually led you to where you are.

Once you accept that you are where you are because of the road you have chosen to travel you are ready to decide what the road ahead looks like, instead of being locked into following the same path.

It starts with understanding how you view the world outside and knowing that it is determined by the way you interpret life inside of you. What we see, how we feel and what we pay attention to is determined by our internal filters, such as past experience, beliefs and culture.

The key to things being different is self-awareness. Once you become self-aware you can become curious, which will then allow you to start to make sense of why you see what you see, why you feel how you feel and why you pay attention to particular things.


You then can disrupt those patterns that are not serving you so that you can start to nurture habits that will move you forward.

Become self-aware

You can’t change the past as it has happened and the only way you can influence the future is by what you do in the now. So choose to live in the now by being present. That is the first step to becoming self-aware.

By being fully present, your mind is less likely to wander and you’ll be able to think more clearly. You can then become aware of your thoughts as well as the words you speak.

Are you speaking to yourself positively? Are you taking ownership for your results? Are you focusing on what you want?

Curiosity will set you free

Now that you’re more aware, it’s time to get curious. This is your opportunity to understand why you say the things you say to yourself and it’s about understanding what and why you say things to others.

Where does the thought process come from? Is it from a belief you have? Is that your belief because you’ve experienced it or is it taken from someone else?

Breaking old patterns

By becoming self-aware, you will also start to see patterns that you will want to remove, which may also be triggers that are not helping you.

This is so that you can move from a position of reacting to a stronger position of being able to respond.

The difference is, reacting often happens quickly and without much thought. It’s an immediate emotional or instinctive reply to a situation. Whereas, responding means you have considered the situation, the possible consequences and you can now make a thoughtful choice about how to act or what to say.

Determine your reality

You can now see and understand why you have your current reality. It’s now your opportunity to decide what you want instead.

Who do you want to be? Where do you want to be? What do you want to experience?

Anything is possible, you simply need to decide what.

Reprogramming from the inside

For you to change your reality, you need to do some reprogramming, which takes practice and patience.

What needs to change for you to be the person you want to be? What are the actions that will get you from where you are today to where you want to be tomorrow? How do you need to think differently?

Maria Newman Coaching

Decide what is most important to you and start taking consistent action that allows you to make the change. Always remember that what happens next is up to you. No one else is responsible for the change you want to see.

The reality you see and experience is temporary. The great news is that you are able to alter your current reality. It takes time and effort and, if it is important to you, I know you will put in the work that leads to the change you want. Just start with the smallest of steps that get things moving and before you know it you will have the momentum you need to make a large impact.

Does your reality need changing?


You might also like to read, 3 reasons why self-talk is your biggest superpower

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