Is it possible to have a stress-free Christmas?
My answer is, of course. However, you may disagree and that is okay.
You may be battling with how you’re going to keep the peace over Christmas because you know you’ll have to manage some awkward relationships.
You may be worrying about how you’re going to get everything done in time for Christmas because you have a to-do list as long as your arm.
You may be feeling stressed already because you’re feeling the pressure of making Christmas amazing.
The only thing that stands in your way of having a stress-free Christmas is you. Does this surprise you?
You see, how things turn out is determined by how we wish to view reality. It’s making the choice to see the glass half empty or half full.
It’s about the way you choose to approach Christmas. What is your intention?
It’s deciding whether you will allow your inner critic, in my case Vera, to hijack the occasion. Or, whether you choose to just notice and then decide your next best move.
That is in your power.
When you choose to respond to what is going on calmly, rather than reacting, the outcome will be so much better.
It starts with helping yourself.
Stop trying to please everyone at Christmas
Have you ever taken the time to decide what you want Christmas to be like?
As a mum, for a long time I was more concerned about making Christmas really special for my family. Getting wrapped up with what everyone else wanted Christmas to be like or what I thought everyone else wanted Christmas to be like.
Basically, people pleasing! Not anymore.
People pleasing is stressful and detracts your attention away from what really matters. So instead of trying to please others, decide what you want Christmas to be like and focus on that. It’s so much easier and as a bonus others will also benefit.
Decide who you need to be
For you to have the Christmas you want, focus on how you need to be and what you need to let go of.
Be honest with yourself and acknowledge the things that make you feel stressed during Christmas. Then do the work that means you can let go. You know you can’t change other people, which by the way is not your responsibility, so stop trying. But you can decide to change so that you feel better.
This is not about becoming the person you think others want you to be but shedding the baggage that makes Christmas feel stressful.
You can start by thinking about how you’d like others to behave towards you. If you’re not already behaving like that this is your starting point.
Que Sera Sera
What will be will be. Accept that if something doesn’t go according to plan that’s okay.
I’m a recovery perfectionist. I know that ensuring everything is just so and all goes well is exhausting. It doesn’t matter if Christmas lunch is late. It doesn’t matter if people turn up a little late. It doesn’t matter if someone gets the wrong present. What matters is that you’re together and safe.
I practice daily showing up and being perfectly imperfect. Yes, it can feel uncomfortable but it’s so much easier and means I can focus on what matters.
Christmas is like a marathon, it can feel like it lasts for ages. So pace yourself. Have a plan that is achievable. Decide what needs to happen and by when.
Thinking about Christmas as one huge event can be overwhelming. By taking one step at a time it becomes more manageable and it feels more manageable.
And remember, Christmas is not just your responsibility. It’s okay to share the load. Make it a family affair. Christmas will feel more special if you share the load.
We only have now so make it count. Stop dwelling on past Christmases that may have not been quite right or gone wrong. Instead, enjoy the journey this Christmas. Be grateful for where you are. Be grateful for what you have. Be grateful for who is around you. It’s about you and your family. No one else.
You can let Christmas be a stressful time of year, if you choose. However, you have the power of choice. You get to decide. You can focus on all the negative stuff. You can focus on all the things that you need to do. You can focus on what might go wrong.
Or, you can decide that this year is going to be better than last year and focus on what matters.
Are you ready for a stress-free Christmas?
Follow me on social media to get my 25 tips to having a stress free Christmas. Each day, starting on 1st December, I will give you one tip per day to help you be stress free this Christmas.
- You might also like to read, Why are mums too busy to pause?
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