From Lost to Laughing: Embracing regaining your identity with fun and excitement

May 24, 2023 | Wellness


Picture this: You wake up one day and realise that the person staring back at you in the mirror feels unfamiliar. The once clear-cut lines of your identity have blurred, leaving you feeling lost, disconnected and unsure of who you truly are.

This doesn’t happen overnight. It’s just that today was the day you acknowledged it.

Feeling like you don’t know who you are anymore is a disorienting experience that many of us encounter at some point in our lives and it can be triggered by a number of things such as a major life transition, societal pressures or simply the passage of time.

The thing is, our identity shapes every aspect of our lives. It influences the way we think, feel and interact with the world around us. It’s the essence of who we are and encompasses our beliefs, values, interests and unique traits.

When we feel disconnected from our identity, we can feel lost, we can feel empty and we can lack purpose.

When you feel like you don’t know who you are anymore, you’ll probably also be feeling disconnected from what is going on around you as well as from the people in your life. It’s like physically going through the motions without any emotion.

Burnt out

People often find themselves grappling with a shifting sense of self and struggling to reconcile who they once were with who they are becoming.

Life transitions, such as starting a new job, ending a relationship or relocating to a new place, can trigger a profound sense of loss and identity questioning.

Suddenly, the things that once defined us no longer fit, leaving us in a state of limbo. Similarly, societal pressures and expectations can shape our perception of who we should be, leading to internal conflicts between our authentic selves and the personas we present to the world.

However, what if I told you that amidst the confusion and uncertainty, there is a way to approach the journey of rediscovering identity with a light-hearted and even humorous perspective?

Instead of getting overwhelmed by the weight of the task and giving our inner critic more ammunition to fire at us, we can choose to embrace this journey with fun and intrigue. By leaning into the whimsical, the unconventional and the downright silly aspects of the process, we can find joy, laughter and a renewed sense of self.

Release the pressure

Feeling like you don’t know who you are anymore can feel heavy and the more we fixate on not knowing the harder it feels. So instead of focusing on what you don’t know and piling on the pressure to come up with the answer, stop. Take a moment to pause and accept where you are right now.

You can then choose to continue dwelling or you can accept that deep down you know who you are. It’s just going to take a little time to reacquaint yourself with that person.

Embrace the opportunity

Not knowing who you are can feel scary. However, what if you decided to view it with the same excitement and intrigue as a child when entering a sweetshop?

This is your opportunity to delve deep into your beliefs, values, interests and unique traits. It’s your chance to get curious and understand, and maybe even rediscover, what makes you tick.

It’s all about the perspective you choose.

Let go of perfection

Embracing imperfection and letting go of unrealistic ideals are vital steps in the process of rediscovering your identity. By accepting our flaws and limitations, we free ourselves from the pressure to conform. 

Letting go allows us to explore new possibilities, experiment with different aspects of ourselves and discover what truly resonates. It involves releasing the need for external validation and instead prioritising our own authenticity and self-compassion.

Embracing imperfection and letting go creates space for growth, self-acceptance and the freedom to evolve into the truest version of ourselves.


Acknowledge who you were

As we enter different chapters of our lives, we’ll naturally evolve and who we were will change. To make that transition easier you need to accept that the person you thought you were may no longer be the person who you want to be or need to be.

Celebrate all the fond memories you have of being that person. Laugh at all the things that didn’t quite go right and acknowledge what that taught you. The filter we view life through is up to us. Be kind to yourself and choose a filter that sees the good, acknowledges the challenges and celebrates the progress you’ve made.

Determine who you’d like to be

Now for some real fun. Who do you want to be? You get to decide. This is not about reinventing yourself into something that you are not. This is about taking the time to decide who the real you is now in this moment. What are your beliefs? What are your values? What are your interests? What makes you who you are? 

Just like a jigsaw puzzle, it’s time to find all the pieces that make up you.

We all feel lost at different times during our lives and when we feel like we don’t know who we are the fun can get sucked out of life and you can feel disconnected. That’s why identity is so important.

Reacquainting yourself with who you are doesn’t have to be a serious and painful exercise. It can be fun and exciting, you just need to decide that it’s like a mini adventure that will always end with you getting to where you need to be.


Is it time to reacquaint yourself with who you are?


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You might also like to read, How to Stop Second-Guessing Yourself and Start Living Boldly

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