Dump the New Year’s resolutions and do this instead

Jan 3, 2024 | Wellness

New Year's Resolutions

POV: New Year’s resolutions don’t work.

Why do people set New Year’s resolutions?

It’s usually to rectify something about themselves that they don’t like.

They don’t like the way they look.

They have a habit that although they probably enjoy doing at the same time there’s a part of them that feels bad whenever they do it.

They don’t like their current situation.

And so, they set a New Year’s resolution to force a change.

Sound familiar?

New Year's Resolutions

The reason why resolutions do not work is down to focus.

Have you ever heard the term where focus goes energy flows?

In simple terms, your life is influenced by what you focus on. So, if you’re focused on the thing you don’t want you will get more of it.

This means your New Year’s resolution is already failing before you’ve started. Simply because you’re focusing on what you don’t want.

By applying a slightly different approach, things will turn out differently.

Focus only on what you do want and more importantly who you want to become. However, that is not the only thing. The underlying factor that will motivate you to continue, even when your inner critic is telling you to give up, is knowing why you want to change.

I haven’t set any New Year’s resolutions in a very long time. I used to set myself annual goals.

However, last year I did something a little different and that is because I decided I wanted to focus on becoming better. Doing things that will challenge me and that naturally take me out of my comfort zone.

In 2023, instead of setting specific goals, I asked myself four simple questions that would shape my year ahead:

  • Who do I want to be?
  • How do I want life to feel?
  • What do I want to have in my life?
  • What will my contribution to life be?

Really simple questions that made me think of my life holistically because life is not about discrete segments. Everything is interlinked so it needs to be viewed as a whole. 

To make my answers real and actionable, I also asked myself what my answers actually meant, i.e. what would that look like, and how I would make that happen.

The answers to these questions are what drove me during 2023. This also gave me the flexibility to adapt what I was doing if it no longer fit or if something came along that was more aligned with what I wanted to do and hadn’t previously planned for.

Coaching, Great, self care, returning to work, Maria Newman

My three highlights from 2023 that challenged me were setting up YaaMas online networking, attaining my black belt and becoming an Enhance NLP coach practitioner. 

Now tell me yours.

I know that 2024 is going to be an amazing year and that is because no matter what actually happens I am in the driver’s seat and it is up to me to choose my course.

It’s now your turn.

Let’s keep it really simple.

I invite you to just answer these two questions.

  • Who do you want to be by the end of 2024?
  • What habits do you need to nurture for you to be that person?

I would love to hear what you’ve come up with, so just send me a message.

I wish you a very happy New Year and look forward to hearing about your progress.

You might also like to read, Living Life on Autopilot Leaves You Numb and Voids Your Experience

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