The Decision Point You Keep Pushing Past — And What to Do About It
You don’t notice it at first because it just feels like a glitch.
Then you brush it off because life is busy, with deadlines, school runs, dinner to make, emails to send, and people depending on you.
You tell yourself you’re tired, or that it’s just one of those weeks, or that you need a holiday.
That works for a while.
You keep going, and everyone around you keeps thinking you’ve got it all together.
And then one morning, you notice you’ve lost patience with small things that used to barely register.
This is your decision point.
You can either decide that life needs to change or accept that this is how it’s going to be and accept the consequences.
Reaching this crossroads doesn’t have to be dramatic
It doesn’t hit you with a thunderbolt.
There’s no neon sign flashing “CHANGE NOW.”
It’s the accumulation of small, persistent feelings that something isn’t working for you anymore, and the sneaky part is that you’re still managing, still coping, still making everything look fine from the outside.
That’s what makes it so easy to ignore.
After all, you can deal with it later.
Once life has calmed down.
And while that might feel comfortable, staying where you are is also a decision, whether you admit it or not, and it’s costing you energy, patience, and your happiness.
You’re already signalling it, even if you don’t say it out loud
When I work with clients, they rarely come to me saying, “I need to figure out my crossroads.”
They come with a sense of nagging unease:
“I’m exhausted, even when I rest,”
“I keep thinking about doing things differently, then talk myself out of it,”
“I feel like I’m going through the motions, and I don’t know why.”
And every time they voice it, they realise they’ve been giving themselves every reason to ignore what’s been going on.
That’s when the work can begin.
Recognising that the discomfort, the impatience and the restless thoughts are all a compass pointing towards a change you’re resisting.
How to know it’s time to step off autopilot
I wouldn’t call these tips in the classic sense, because they’re more like invitations to notice yourself and act in ways you’ve been avoiding:
Observe your reactions over time
It’s not a single bad day that signals you’ve reached a crossroads. It’s the repeated exhaustion, irritation, or lack of joy that tells you something has changed.
Notice the patterns in your “I don’t know” moments
Every time you say you’re unsure or “still figuring it out,” pause and ask yourself whether it’s really indecision, or if you’ve already made a decision unconsciously by continuing to do the same thing.
Look at your actions, not your thoughts
Your behaviour is the honest mirror of your current choices. If your actions don’t align with what you claim to want, that’s a crossroads in itself.
Ask the hard question
“If nothing changes in six months, will I be okay with that?” The answer to this will tell you exactly what’s going on. It’s then up to you what you do next.
Take one intentional step forward
Change isn’t about taking a big leap. It comes through a series of small decisions. Pick one thing this week that nudges your life in a different direction.
This is exactly what I help women do
I work with clients to understand what is really going on, so they can move in the direction that is right for them and in the way that is right for them.
Sometimes that’s boundaries you’ve avoided for years. Sometimes that’s how you show up differently in your work or relationships. And sometimes it’s finally giving yourself permission to want something different.
The moment you stop pretending you’re stuck, is the moment you own your small, persistent decisions and everything changes.
You don’t have to do it all today.
Instead, do one thing at a time.
Start with noticing. Start with one honest choice. One conversation. One boundary. One small change in the way you show up.
The crossroads you’ve been dancing around won’t disappear on its own, and ignoring it only stretches the discomfort. The choice is always yours; the question is, what decision will you make?
If trying to resolve this by yourself is too difficult, check out The Shift Sessions.
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