Life will be better when you get off the fence

Often, we have more control over a situation than we may think or feel. At the very least, if it’s really bad we do have the option to step away. Yes, it may take courage but it’s still an option.
Back in 2016, I knew that my career wasn’t what I wanted it to be. I had just had my second baby and I knew I wanted to change things. But I wasn’t quite sure how. So I decided to leave my job. To force me to make a decision. Rather than just carrying on knowing that it wasn’t right for me.
This may sound extreme, but it was the best move for me.
I know that it’s always our responsibility to decide what our next best move is. Nobody else’s. So when something isn’t quite right, that’s your cue to do something.
I also know that sometimes it’s easier to just go with it and stay. I mean it’s not that bad. It’s fine, it’s okay and it’s alright. These are what I like to call bland words. Words that really don’t mean anything. You might as well not be saying anything. These are the words that stop you from taking action.

Sometimes these words are used because we’re comfortable just sitting on the fence. Not wanting to make a decision. At that moment in time, we feel stuck and unsure of what to do. So we do nothing.
Sometimes it feels easier to do nothing and hope all will be okay. Sometimes the answer isn’t obvious and so sitting on the fence is the only answer. Sometimes the pain is not enough to inspire action.
But you do have a choice. You get to decide whether you stay stuck and on the fence or whether you change things.
The power is in your hands.
So I ask you, what’s the first thing you do when you’re faced with a challenge in your life?
Do you run away and hide?
Do you rely on someone else to help you resolve it?
Do you hope it will sort itself?
Or
Do you face it head on?
Do you take the time to consider your options?
Do you put on your big girl pants and deal with it?
Life will always send us challenges that will affect different parts of our lives.
You may be having difficulties at work, you may be experiencing some challenges with your relationship or you might be feeling not quite yourself. Whichever it might be, I would like to reassure you that you do have the answer.
It just takes pausing, reflecting and then deciding on your next best move.
Understand the situation
Take the time to understand your challenge. What is it? Why do you see it as a challenge? How does it make you feel? What thoughts are popping into your head? It’s like doing a bit of data gathering. Data helps us to make a decision. So use some time to get to know what is actually going on, instead of making assumptions and filling the gaps.
Acknowledge your contribution
Tough as it may be to hear, but our reality is our making. The challenge that you are facing has not just happened. It’s important to accept the part that you will have played in it. This will help you to avoid being the victim and take responsibility for your actions in this situation.
What’s your desired outcome
It’s simple, what outcome do you want. What does it look like? What does it feel like? Make it colourful and turn up the volume. If you could get the best outcome, what would it be?

What are options do you have
We always have options, even if we don’t feel like them. So take the time to determine yours. Look at the situation from different perspectives. It’s about thinking without limitations or restrictions. Maybe even being creative.
What actions could you take
Now decide what steps you will take to overcome your challenge. These are steps that are within your control. Steps that are manageable and doable. Not reliant on other people. We can’t make others do anything but we are in control of ourselves. How this plays out is in your hands so commit to it fully if you really want it.
Always remember you have a choice. You get to decide what happens next. It may feel uncomfortable. There may be consequences that you’d rather put off or avoid. But ultimately you know what your next best move is. So unless you’re happy with where you are, dig deep and take action to get to where you want to go.
How will you overcome your next challenge?
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You might also like to read, Is life a balancing act?
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